Messed Up Christmas

Christmas is messed up this year. No, I’m not talking about Christianity gone astray. Celebrating Christ’s birth is still the dominant theme for myself and many others. Despite annual complaints about holy season becoming too materialistic, the balance of ‘spiritual’ and ‘stuff’ is intact within most families. So, if you’re not on a spiritual journey, you should be. If you don’t get the aftershave or perfume you would have picked, it’s all good.  

What bothers me about Christmas isn’t the advertising. That’s everywhere and all year long. Believe me, I’m very good at turning all that commotion off in my brain and concentrating on things that matter. If I don’t buy what they want me to buy, they’ll make less money and maybe go out of business. But, we’re not gonna change the hawking and razzle dazzle that goes on.

What is troublesome for me is how the holiday season is so casually tossed off as unimportant. Becomes a drill to go through, unless it fits a schedule, follows an agenda and leverages singular desires. Isn’t really the fake Christmas of holiday shopping, maxing out the credit cards, or putting a spotlight on your house. The difficulty is the lack of human kindness. Being unwilling to reach out to family and others in a meaningful way that makes this Christmas, well, a little less Christmas.  

In truth, I pine for (no pun intended) those simpler holiday seasons. Christmastime had its dose of festive cheer, but we maintained a healthier portion of religious observance celebrating the Holy Birth. The resulting warmth in our hearts emanating from the Star in the East was liberating. That spirit was manifested into deliberate acts of kindness toward others, long before there was a GoFundMe page.

By the early sixties, television had begun its long, slow descent into hell and advertising became king. Massive audience manipulation occurred, target audiences were created. Slick marketing ploys were unveiled, getting us to believe we really, really had to have whatever they were pushing. Ultimately, mass communication has opened doors for us as a species. Still, it seems to have irreparably stunted our growth in the name of our blind quest for knowledge. Instead of learning our place in the cosmos, we have become slaves to our own internal desires. We wait for that next slick marketing ploy to take us where it wants us to go. 

As children, we are fixated on whatever toy we are hoping to find under the tree on Christmas Day. I remember getting a Slinky one year and being excited beyond belief. Mighta been only six or seven at the time. The television jingle (‘It’s Slinky, It’s Slinky, For fun it’s a wonderful toy…’) played in my head constantly. Everyone wants a Slinky was right. While it had been in my thoughts since way before Thanksgiving, on Christmas Day I couldn’t contain my enthusiasm. I ended up playing with that Slinky too hard and tangling it all to hell before sundown. That day, I knew I was alone in the universe. I threw the mangled Slinky into the trash, along with cool box it came in. Then, I stood in silence, scratched my head and moved on.

For many years, I have wandered in silence, still trying to understand the disappointment of Christmas. How was it possible an event as sacred as Christmas would bring such sadness, even melancholy? Sure, expectations were high with that Slinky. But, what was driving me over the edge, unable to join in with others and share my joy? What keeps us humble and spiritually connected? Love. A love of life, of family, and the good fortunes we are blessed with. We learn to better manage our bad luck and carry on as best we can. 

So much of our lives are fleeting, insignificant little details that end up on the side of the road. Even many of our dreams end up falling by the wayside, unable to take root. Yet, we remain intact and still very capable of carrying on. Otherwise, there is no wonder many of us remain stuck in the same place, day after day, year after year. 

The truth is we are all connected and in this together. What happens to me, affects all those who know me and many who don’t. The pain of my brother is a pain of my own heart and I must remediate the pain in both. We are not our brothers’ or sisters’ keeper. We are equal partners, each wishing for peace on earth and good will toward men.

So, if you get the chance to lend a hand, do it with all your heart. If you can spread a little Christmas cheer, some of those deliberate acts of kindness, go for it. After all, you’ll be helping yourself as much as those around you. Think about it. If everyone goes for it, it’ll all work out and will have been done for all the right reasons.

Merry Christmas to all my family and friends. A special greeting to all who disgust me, disappoint me, and especially those who are the bane of my discontent. Turn off the television and spread some cheer.